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Funny Thanksgiving Jokes and Stories - PG 1

From our Collection of Thanksgiving Humor. We have collected these Thanks Giving Jokes and Thanksgiving Holiday stories to amuse you on this lovely day. Hope you enjoy the show. It's the best thanksgiving website in town or my name ain't Squanto.

Happy Thanks Giving Everybody!

Telltale Signs That You Overdid It At Thanksgiving If...

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You spilled more food on you than the local soup kitchen dispenses.

Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy.

Your after dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr. Kevorkian.

The "Gravy Boat" your wife set out was a real 14' boat!

The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland.

You get grass stains on your butt after a walk, but never sat down. 

Your "Big Elvis Super-Belt" won't even go around your waist.

You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail.

You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday.

Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.

You have 5 TV sets side-by-side to catch all the football games.

A guest quotes a Biblical passage from "The Feeding of the 5000."

That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn.

Your wife wears a life jacket at night in your water bed.

Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame
called twice. 

You consider gluttony as your patriotic duty.

It looks like the left-overs are going last until Christmas.


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